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Forums - General Discussion - The Official How to get laid thread. NSF-18

Hello, I am Neos, and I present you a short and simple guide how to get the most out of your life, or in other words, getting laid a lot.

** NOTE : This isn't guaranteed , just some very handy tips, I am not responsible for any unwanted consequences **

--

1. Getting to know a lot of people. This is the first key to success, if you don't know the people, how can you get laid? Some ways to get to know a lot of people is having a Job where you interact with a lot of different kinds of people. Other ways are school (although that's hard for some people because you can't just suddenly go and interact with new people and they already have set an image of you). Going out is a way for success on a short time, but usually those people aren't the kind that want to do things with you the days after that night. Family is not-done, simply because your cousins and nieces will never do a good word for you, they want to have success.

2. It doesn't matter if they are taken or ugly, or are bisexual. The point is that even those that are taken are useful for you, especially the popular ones. Because girls know girls, and when you are a good and helping friend of a taken one, they will introduce you to their friends, and say good things about you. the rule ugly girls only know ugly girls isn't true either, so an ugly girl can help you to more prettier ones as well. You always need to be as friendly as possible, even when it doesn't seem useful or have an effect.

3. Compliments are a girl’s best friend. Every girl loves having compliments about their clothes, behavior, taste, kinds of success, or whatever.

4. Guys always need to take the initiative. Even when you don't feel to, or always think it has to come from your side, you always need to take action yourself, they like that.

5. Don't be yourself, only if you want to have a relationship with the girl. You can be whoever you want to be, act like a complete dick if those specific girls like that, or be a gentleman if you met a classy one. This of course only applies if you have just met a new girl. You want to have that girl, so you do whatever it takes to get her to the bed.

6. Girls are as often horny as guys. Sure it doesn't seem to, but that's simply because they want to hide it. I believe it is a fact that girls can be as horny as guys, it all depends on the type of person, and how you threat it. The types of conversations are important here, you don't want too much chit-chat, so go straight over to the subjects that can't take daylight, they like that.

7. Buy them things. All girls like presents, of all types. Even when it's food. They always feel like they want to return the favor somehow, and you know how. You start with some innocent things and slowly go over to the less gentle things, they often find that exciting. Giving good massages can make things a lot easier!

8. The most important one, never ever talk about your ex girlfriends. Also completely lie about how many you had, it needs to be less than she had. They often like the more shy ones that supposedly don't have much experience, oh how you know better *giggles*.

9. The last one, how to get them inside your place. Don't go to their places, as you want to feel safe inside your home, it's for the best. Rent movies, get some relaxing music up, and say your chairs aren't that comfy and that you suggest using the bed instead. And of course, always have enough rubbers.

10. If you don't have rubbers, pull it out. If you don't, bad things might happen. Stress isn't good, trust me.

11. (this is a secret one), This specific girl, doesn't really have to be your girlfriend. I know everyone has 1 or several girls as friends around them. These friends sometimes also have urges..

Copyright 2008 Neos ® and Neos ® inc. All rights reserved.

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Feel free to add things.

 

 



Neos - "If I'm posting in this thread it's just for the lulz."
Tag by the one and only Fkusumot!


 

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You are unbelievable. That's all.



 

.:Dark Prince:. said:
You are unbelievable. That's all.

Thank you.

 



Neos - "If I'm posting in this thread it's just for the lulz."
Tag by the one and only Fkusumot!


 

I'd lock this but you put so much work into it that I just couldn't bring myself to do it.



 

 

MontanaHatchet said:
I'd lock this but you put so much work into it that I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

Why? it's perfectly normal =P

 



Neos - "If I'm posting in this thread it's just for the lulz."
Tag by the one and only Fkusumot!


 

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Neos said:
MontanaHatchet said:
I'd lock this but you put so much work into it that I just couldn't bring myself to do it.

Why? it's perfectly normal =P

 

Hmm, how should I put this?

Okay, I'm finished with Order 66, but now I'm undergoing the Great Jedi Purge.

I'll spare this thread because it's powerful with the win.

 



 

 

Lol.. now we have to wait until somebody writes: The Official "So you got her in bed.. now what?" thread... :)

But you forgot to mention the many dangers: Her Father.. her mother.. the cuter sister.. her best "hotter" friend... her jealous "just friends" male friend... Alcohol... you should warn the little ones about these dangers..



 

Face the future.. Gamecenter ID: nikkom_nl (oh no he didn't!!) 

NiKKoM said:
Lol.. now we have to wait until somebody writes: The Official "So you got her in bed.. now what?" thread... :)

But you forgot to mention the many dangers: Her Father.. her mother.. the cuter sister.. her best "hotter" friend... her jealous "just friends" male friend... Alcohol... you should warn the little ones about these dangers..

There is no point mentioning those, as it is your goal not to know them, but ignore. Alcohol is a good point however.



Neos - "If I'm posting in this thread it's just for the lulz."
Tag by the one and only Fkusumot!


 

Neos said:

Hello, I am Neos, and I present you a short and simple guide how to get the most out of your life, or in other words, getting laid a lot.

** NOTE : This isn't guaranteed , just some very handy tips, I am not responsible for any unwanted consequences **

--

1. Getting to know a lot of people. This is the first key to success, if you don't know the people, how can you get laid? Some ways to get to know a lot of people is having a Job where you interact with a lot of different kinds of people. Other ways are school (although that's hard for some people because you can't just suddenly go and interact with new people and they already have set an image of you). Going out is a way for success on a short time, but usually those people aren't the kind that want to do things with you the days after that night. Family is not-done, simply because your cousins and nieces will never do a good word for you, they want to have success.

Nothing to add. Going out, and work are the best places. Traveling a lot with public transport is also awesome. If that fails, use the internet. There is no shame in using the internet to get some self-esteem and pick up some easy lay.

2. It doesn't matter if they are taken or ugly, or are bisexual. The point is that even those that are taken are useful for you, especially the popular ones. Because girls know girls, and when you are a good and helping friend of a taken one, they will introduce you to their friends, and say good things about you. the rule ugly girls only know ugly girls isn't true either, so an ugly girl can help you to more prettier ones as well. You always need to be as friendly as possible, even when it doesn't seem useful or have an effect.

Taken indeed doesn't matter. One of my "relationships" was with a married woman. One of my girls has a boyfriend. It helps if you don't have much of a conscience. But if you have, take the above tip for granted. Just hang out with the friends of you're friends.

3. Compliments are a girl’s best friend. Every girl loves having compliments about their clothes, behavior, taste, kinds of success, or whatever.

They also don't mind to be teased, as long as it's not a sensitive subject. In fact, the best order is: Give compliments, then tease, then make small bets.. etc ;).

4. Guys always need to take the initiative. Even when you don't feel to, or always think it has to come from your side, you always need to take action yourself, they like that.

9 out of ten is indeed the guys initiative. If you don't have the initiative but she does... then expect handcuffs on you ;). Please enjoy the ride!

5. Don't be yourself, only if you want to have a relationship with the girl. You can be whoever you want to be, act like a complete dick if those specific girls like that, or be a gentleman if you met a classy one. This of course only applies if you have just met a new girl. You want to have that girl, so you do whatever it takes to get her to the bed.

Lying also helps... well, bending the truth a little. Friend of mine is a marine. His profession in a bar? Dolphin trainer. Me? I'm an amateur boxer... but I don't fight matches anymore. I used to, few years ago. Junior champion in the region in my weightclass... you know how to go from here.

6. Girls are as often horny as guys. Sure it doesn't seem to, but that's simply because they want to hide it. I believe it is a fact that girls can be as horny as guys, it all depends on the type of person, and how you threat it. The types of conversations are important here, you don't want too much chit-chat, so go straight over to the subjects that can't take daylight, they like that.

Nothing to add, entirely true. Preferably, talk about the few experiences you have had (see also below), blunders you committed, etc.

7. Buy them things. All girls like presents, of all types. Even when it's food. They always feel like they want to return the favor somehow, and you know how. You start with some innocent things and slowly go over to the less gentle things, they often find that exciting.

True, but not always necessary. See what kind of girl you have.

8. The most important one, never ever talk about your ex girlfriends. Also completely lie about how many you had, it needs to be less than she had. They often like the more shy ones that supposedly don't have much experience, oh how you know better *giggles*.

This sort of depends on the type of relationship you have with one... wether it's a one nighter, a long term relationship or a loose relationship. As I mentioned before, I'm in the latter categorie. I'm open about it and can easily discuss with either girlfriends what I did with the other girl... also what happened to past girls. Mind you, this subject is completely off limits in with one night stand. If you are going for that, keep shy as Neos mentioned, unless she deliberatly asks for the subject, or you think you can pull it off without sounding like a jackass.

9. The last one, how to get them inside your place. Don't go to their places, as you want to feel safe inside your home, it's for the best. Rent movies, get some relaxing music up, and say your chairs aren't that comfy and that you suggest using the bed instead. And of course, always have enough rubbers.

This I have to counter. Going to their place is usually the smart thing to do. Girls are usually just as nervous, perhaps even more so then guys. It helps if they feel comfortable within their own home. You can then rightfully ask them to show you around, etc untill you get to the bedroom... There are cases where you can go to you're own home, for instance when it's closer by and the girl trusts you completely. Otherwise, don't. If you propose to go to one of you're houses, go to hers instead.

Copyright 2008 Neos ® and Neos ® inc. All rights reserved.

--

Feel free to add things.

 

 

Check above... also added: Learn how to give massages. 9 Out of ten of my massages end in getting laid. The tenth one? Her parents got home.

 



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